New Computer...blogging again

Our Christmas was spent at HOME.... it was glorious. It was the first year in 6 years that I haven't had to drive 10 hours both ways to Pittsburg. It was so nice to spend time with Michael family in Springfield, MO the weekend before Christmas. We left on Friday and were home on Sunday night.

Christmas Eve, We went to chuch. Then we went to eat dinner at Lone Star Steak house. We came home and watched Christmas movies. We both finished wrapping gifts and then went to bed. The next morning it was just us. We made cinnamon rolls, drank coffee and opened our gifts. It was so fun just the two of us. Shortly after cleaning up ....I started the feast. I started cooking at 9:30am for my Dad and step-mom's arrival. On the Menu:
1. Ham glazed in brown sugar and butter
2. Stuffing
3. Mashed Potatoes
4. Green beans
5. Cranberry sause
6. Salad
7. Rolls
8. Sweet Carrots

And Brenda brought the desserts. We gorged ourselves on food....gultany at its finest. It was nice just spending time with them and they left by 4:30 to go back to Pinckneyville. So Michael and I were back to being by ourselves. And did.... nothing. I had scheduled to go ice skating...but Michael opted to stay in and watch movies. Great First Christmas.... Here's some more pictures.

I've been using all my words in counseling.....

I just wanted you all to know that I am still alive - just overwhelmed. I will have a computer up soon that I can load pictures on and then let the blogging begin again. Thanks for all the people who've checked on me...

News from the Rheumatolgist

I have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia. It explains my many years of chronic pain, that in the past few years has become worse to the point that I cannot sleep. However, it does not explain why my cervical issues persist. One thing at a time, I guess. My doctor said that is from prolonged periods of high stress and anxiety, along with inconsistent exercise. This is me...! So I have been put on medicine that I will start taking tomorrow (didn't do it during finals because it makes you drowsy.) It will help my joint pain...help me sleep and also will give me the relief I need to endure working out again. Did I say..it will help me sleep - YEAH - more than 4 hours at a time will be great.

Here's some information for those of you who are not familiar w/ Fibromyalgia:

*Fibromyalgia is a physical condition that can also affect your mood. It is not "all in your head." However, like many people who have chronic pain, people with fibromyalgia are more likely to have depression and may require specific treatment for it.

*Stress and depression can often make fibromyalgia worse. Dealing with the symptoms of fibromyalgia can itself cause stress and depression. This cycle can become very frustrating.

*Fibromyalgia does not cause permanent damage to the muscles or joints. For some people, however, chronic pain does disrupt daily life and makes certain activities more difficult. Home treatment to control your pain and other symptoms may allow you to continue your usual activities.

*Most people can manage their symptoms with the help of their regular doctors. If necessary, seeing a doctor who specializes in treating conditions that affect the joints and muscles (rheumatologist) or a doctor who specializes in physical rehabilitation (physiatrist) may be helpful.

Snow, Snow and More Snow...and oh yeah.. Finals

So it really snowed in St. Louis. More than I have seen since I was a kid and everything seemed big. Here are some photos of our fun in the snow. Seven Inches.....turning into 9 inches
Chewy...Digs his head into the snow like an ostreich.

Michael is just a big kid.

Shak'n it Covenant Style...Christmas Banquet

Michael and I got the chance to go to the Covenant Christmas Banquet. Here are some pictures.

Michael and I

Isn't He cute...

Laura, Kristy and I....smiles all around.

Our First Christmas....

Christmas is my FAVORITE season! I usually make my house look like christmas threw up in side. Every room has decorations. I love Christmas. So naturally the weekend after Thanksgiving, I was begging my husband to go get a tree.

I would have put up the fake tree I had for 4 years but my cat destroyed it last year. So this year, our first Christmas ....we were going to get a real tree. This I thought would be so fun as I remembered back to when I was 7 years old and went out with the whole family to find the perfect tree at the Tree Farm. We'd cut it down, bring it home and in my mind, it was always perfect.

Many of you might not know this but my husband is brilliant yet has the HARDEST time making decisions. I mean he can pick out a movie or his meal at a restaurant but we spent about an hour going back and forth trying to pick a tree in the FREEZING RAIN. This was not optimal tree picking weather. But gosh darn it ... Thanksgiving was over and I wanted my tree.

We found our tree, stuffing it into the back of my Ford Focus... of course it was hanging out the window... oh yeah ... remember it was raining...and cold and we had a the window down. I love my husband, because at this point he could have been really cranky but he was a trooper for me, because I LOVE Christmas.

We decided not to have them mount our tree in a tree stand. Why pay them $20 to do it when we are two capable college graduates? Its a tree stand... how hard can it be?......Famous last words. This became the decision we wished we could take back. It took us a good hour to get the tree in the stand and wiggling it and moving it to make it straight. I also didn't estimate the size so it took some time to find a place where it would fit and then have to rearrange the furniture so it would fit.....Our tree ended up in the dinning room.

Michael had a volleyball game that night. We started to decorating and I was going to demonstrate my tree decorating skills that I bragged about. I have Christmas music on.... pulling out all my old ornaments. Michael at this point was not so happy and full of the spirit as I would have liked but he did spend 1 hour wrestling the tree. Needles were all over the floor. I had imagined our first Christmas tree as such a joyous time... but it was something Michael was begrudingly participated in. Michael put the star up and then got ready for his volleyball game. ..........

I put the finishing touches on the tree and Michael left. I noticed the unstability of the tree as it was crashing to ground. I think the straw that brought the tree to the ground was the Star. I fell to the ground in a puddle of tears. Our first Christmas tree was in shambles on the ground, ornaments thrown about (some broken), and I didn't know if I could get it back up by myself. In utter frustration.... I threw the tree up, leaning it into the corner and I was Flaming MAD. I tried calling him as I was crying... but he was already playing and didn't answer. It was probably a good thing.

I gave up and picked up the ornaments and waited for Micahel to get home. Michael came home and saw how distraught I was and just laughed and patiently helped me get the tree back up. We really rigged this tree. We put weights on the back to keep it from tipping over and even put pieces of wood under it to see if we could even it out. We started to decorate again... Michael now in the mood I hoped be in when we first started this process. We laughed, told Christmas stories, and hung ornaments. We finished the tree. It had a "gangster lean" to it but it was up.

So we got it up.... got a do over for hanging the tree and survived. I think we're going to get a fake tree for next year though.....

I Know there is a lot I should blog about BUT....

I have so much to blog on ... Mizzou loosing, Michael & I and our first christmas tree, our 6 month anniversary.... but I am feel led to blog about this FIRST....

MOVIE TRAILER HAS BEEN RELEASED

Coming to a Theater....May 30, 2008

http://movies.aol.com//movie/sex-and-the-city-2008/30247/video/trailer-no-1/2033774

Watch and Get EXCITED!

Praise...and Confession

Hallelujah! Praise God from heaven, praise him from the mountaintops; Praise him, all you his angels, praise him, all you his warriors, Praise him, sun and moon, praise him, you morning stars; Praise him, high heaven, praise him, heavenly rain clouds; Praise, oh let them praise the name of God— he spoke the word, and there they were!

Psalms 148:1 (Msg.)

So ... I got the call from Green Tree Auto and Tire ......and it was only a clamp that broke from a hose.... $56.00 - PRAISE GOD. And ...Michael only minimally freaked out.

I confess humbly at the feet of my gracious Savior...He is always faithful when I am everything but faithful or even prayerful, thinking that things are beyond His control or out of His care. He cares for me and everything that I care for. I have a too frenquent tendancies to forget this... and in that I realize how much I am undeserving of the grace and mercy Jesus gives me through his sacrifice and not mine (which is always insufficient). My control freak tendancies get in the way of being a servant dependant on the FAITHFUL SAVIOR!

Carin and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Alexander and I are both moving to Australia..... because cars don't break down in Australia
(EVERY MONTH)

All I can say is UGH!

and pray that the day is over sooner than later with minimal cost incurred...

How much do you think a ticket to Australia is?

By the way young or old - if you haven't read this book - it is a must read!

Words

Where have my words gone?

I haven't posted in about 2-3 weeks. It is not that I have nothing to talk about - so much is going on but its mainly personal and I feel I will bore you with the details of my life while you are trying to live your life. I have tried to think of profound things, I mean I am in Seminary... but the words all seem ordinary. I think it's that I have lost the ability to actually name how I am feeling and what's really going on. I think its because I am not sure. Life has been a blur, its all of a sudden Monday and Friday in an instance. School is ... well it's the end of the semester - need I say more and the holidays are coming up which always conjures up a tornado of feelings.

This year will be a new way of thinking and being since I have to share my traditions, time, and space with an entirely new family (like having 3 sets of parents wasn't enough). It will not be as it always has been... it will be different and I am trying to find the joy and beauty in that but it's hard. However, I am excited about traditions Michael and I can start together. It's kind of like a family do-over I am finding out when you now have a family of my own (Michael and I but it's still a family). We've already decided to watch all our favorite Christmas Cartoons after Church on Christmas Eve and drink hot chocolate and just lay on the couch.

If you have any great things you did as a newlywed on your first Christmas - I'd love to hear them.

Joe VS The Volcano Kind of Day

Do you ever feel like this at work?

I love my job but today is a Joe vs. the Volcano kind of day

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

This is Michael's creation...he worked 5 hours one this pumkin and I think he did an OUTSTANDING JOB... he has way more patience than I do.

Desi's Homecoming Party

Since Desi left, I have been trying to get her home and it finally worked...but only for a moment. Thanks Desi for sharing your adventure with us. I love you and miss you and can't wait till you're home for Christmas.

Pictures I promised

Pictures from Mizzou....

Pictures to Ponder.....

I WILL BE SPENDING MY ENTIRE WEEKEND DOING HOMEWORK.

• 200 PAGES TO READ
• 1 RESEARCH PAPER (THAT I HAVE AN EXTENSION ON)
• 8 JOURNAL ENTRIES
• RESEARCH ARTICLE FOR ANOTHER CLASS
• GROUP PROJECT MEETING

Can I just graduate soon....? I am tired.

It couldn't have been any SWEETER!

vs
The weekend was great! The game was AMAZING. I will post more but for now...for those who missed the game, here's some highlights.

Going back to the scene of the crime(s)

Michael and I both graduated from Mizzou... however we went to two DIFFERENT schools. My consisted of happy hours and Frat parties while he made the deans list and played in intermural sports. Two people, on the same campus with complete polar opposite experiences.

This weekend we're going back! Mizzou is playing Nebraska and we're going to visit a student who was involved in our youth ministry. We are so excited to go back! I have to admit though... I am a little nervous... there's a lot of skeletons in the closet in Columbia and I am hoping that I am able to keep them in the closet. I will be showing Michael around to MY MIZZOU. We're visiting the restaurant I worked at for 4 year in college, The Pasta Factory (HIGHLY RECOMMENDED) and that's saying something since I did work there. After that , were going to a few establishments like Harpo's and maybe even Deja Vu but I definitely will be going by Trops. Oh... the memories.

Saturday is a little different than we expected....the game was moved from 1pm to 8:15pm so I am hoping to go around campus, go by Booches for some burgers and just take in Columbia. But
MIZZOU-RAH!!!!!!! Full update when we get back!

Things they are a Changing......

At my doctor's visit on Monday, my doctor asked that I get a blood test to check for HIV and ANA (Antinuclear Antibodies). I am negative for HIV but positive for ANA. People who test positive for ANA have problems producing good antibodies that produce what the body needs to heal. She has told me that I have to follow up with a Rheumatologist. I am just sick of Doctors. I am sick of being of being sick. I am scared that this could be an indicator of me having Lupus, diabetes, or an autoimmune disease that I will have to deal with the rest of my life. I am frustrated that all I want to do is start my life and enjoy being married and start planning for the future but I feel like I can't because all of this is getting in the way.

In a positive light – I am hoping that this might be the missing link to giving me answers to how to get rid of the HPV and stay healthier. I have decided that God is giving me a wake up call and I need to out of Youth ministry for a while – for my health. It is time to take a break and take care of myself physically, emotionally and spiritually. I am hoping the time I have not going to youth group and meetings, etc. will give me less stress (good for my body), allow me to get more rest, and give me time for things like working out and extra time for studying. I told my youth pastor last night and my kids. I have talked to Michael and we think it is best to fulfill my commitment w/ our 40 days of community program. It lasts until the 24th. So that Wednesday will be my last youth group for a while. I am scared of letting the kids down, of creating staffing problems where they won't have enough people to stay in their home groups and I will miss them. It is not easy making this decision but I can't do ministry when I am able to care for myself.

I am trying to remember that when you follow Jesus - Truly follow him - his path will lead me to the Cross.

Too Much HGTV has finally paid off!

So ... since getting cable - due to the amount of crap on television...I watch a lot of home shows. I have learned a lot from everything from Curb Appeal to redesigning your house with only moving around furniture and add some paint.

Friday night, while I was suppose to be studying - I came up w/ the idea to rearrage my living room. It was really cramped and not very welcoming to having any more than 2 people over. Well since we are renting we can't do much w/ the space issue but Michael and I were able to move it around so there is a better flow to the room and we even able to decorate the walls better - it just fit better.

We are so happy and now we have one more thing to justify our spurge on cable. Thank you HGTV

I feel a sense of "healthy" pride

Today I was able to get to the end of the month for the first time since being married, and we have extra money. I feel a sense of pride that I have been able to pinch pennies enough and has paid off. We are almost credit card debt free. I finally feel like we are getting things to be manageable and organized.

Praise God for curbing my impulse buying and giving me self-control.