I know it seems funny for me with all that's going on to blog about a silly TV show but I have share my thoughts.
I am no stranger to difficulty in marriage. I have seen it first hand growing up and also in my own marriage. As a believer in a majestic and miraculous God. I believe He always gives a way to heal our broken hearts, forgive and start over. He is the great physician. His is always pro-marriage, no matter what the circumstances, the hurt, the wrongs. I know what most of you are thinking - well why does Jesus teach on divorce. Well - it's not because it's his first option or that he approves. But men were tossing their wives aside during the first century and before, leaving them destitute and powerless because of divorce. And God gave us guidelines for even sinful situations because He loves us. However, He is the God of reconciliation. Look what he did on the cross to reconcile us, an adulterous people, back to himself not for his benefit but for our salvation.
We are broken and fallen people. We will sin against our significant other. We will hurt each other intentionally and unintentionally but we can't stay there.
As I watched the season premier of J&K+8, I hurt for them both, for their kids, for their church family. I am wondering if their church is stepping in to help heal this situation. I hope the pastor has gotten involved - it's his responsibility. If one falls away we are to restore them gently. Now more than ever this family needs the hope of the gospel. If Jesus raised men from the dead think what power he possess to resurrect their family and restore it to a state better than they ever dreamed. Divorce should never be an option....we grieve it because it's not the way it is suppose to be.
I am committing to pray for this family and all families who are going through hardship, separation, disappointments and hopeless moments. God CAN HEAL YOUR MARRIAGE - if you let him. It takes a huge amount of trust, faith, and obedience. Marriages must be the foundation of the family. It's not supposed to be all about the kids. Kids are the blessing/ the bi-product of a loving relationship with Christ at it's core. I know this doesn't always happen. But if you're doing it for the kids you need to know that faking it for the kids is not helping. Step away - get your marriage on track and then you can be a blessing to your children. Be a testament of the power of Christ in a marriage - show the World what most of them don't know. THAT CHRIST CAN HEAL ANY SITUATION - and we don't have to resort to the easy way out, the world's way of doing things.
I know women/men who have dealt with extraordinary obstacles in their marriage: infidelity with multiple partners, ongoing porn additions, abandonment, abuse of every kind and because of their faith in God, with the assistance of their church family and steps toward reconciliation- their marriage not only survived but they came out stronger than they ever thought they could be. The Lord gives us His power to preserve, to heal, to forgive, and to grow stronger. Was it hard - YES, was it worth it - heck yes!
One thing to remember - our spouses are not here to provide us with earthly fulfillment, contentment, or even happiness. They are here to be an instrument to help perfect us in Christ-likeness, to make us holy. WE WILL NEVER BE HAPPY OR FULFILLED because of anyone else. That's not their purpose. ONLY GOD can ever bring us to that place we push, force, squeeze and even insist that our spouse should be for us. I have to remind myself of that daily. It's easier to look to Michael to "make me happy" and serve my needs than it is to trust God to provide my needs and serve Him.
Thank you for listening/reading my rantings. I felt compelled to share my thoughts and feelings on this since it hits so close to home. I want the world to know there is another option out there other than divorce - it does take hard work, pain, dealing with hard and ugly stuff about yourself and the other person. But nothing worth having is easy, pain free or without sacrifice.
I hope that there is a counselor/pastor out there that knows this family and many others and steps up to the plate to say - "what's going on here isn't what God has for you. He has better and I want to help you restore your marriage and your family." If you take the steps towards reconciliation God doesn't just meet you half way ....he does way more than that. Because by choosing to be obedient to your wedding vows, you choose to put God's way first instead of your emotions or your opinions. He honors that obedience!
I am committing myself to being a voice for PRO-MARRIAGE and praying for healing for so many couples out there, and for my own marraige. I hope you will join me.
